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Showing posts with label self harm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self harm. Show all posts

6 Mar 2013

Monkey, you remember Back.

Only halfway to the ideas of March and I'm burnt out already. Not that summer's ever been kind. Blotches, rashes, migraines, car crashes- it's spawned them all. I lost two years of my life to the cruel Chennai sun. I fled from Singapore coz I couldn't take the heat.

It's not an affliction many people understand. It's not as glamorous as say, an "actual" disability. But summer here in Bombay is more real, life-like. I can't lock myself up indoors and hibernate in a cloud of smoke, or stick to air-conditioned environments. There's a life to be led now, things that need doing.

Still.

I don't so much mind that I'm a few shades darker, but old battle scars now shine a little brighter on my arm. Reminding, judging, warning.

Still.

In the cab today morning, somewhere on Sea Link, the floor mat leaps up in surprise at the audacity of a very confrontational speed breaker to reveal a hole underneath it the size of my foot. I kick it aside and watch the road speed by in a blur of cement and mortar and mediocrity.

And I tell myself I could do with a fix.

Icy High's Music Recco: "Deeper and Deeper"- The Fixx